Love You Chloe Marie

I just wanted to let everyone know that today has been a great day.  Of course no day is absolutely great without my daughter but since she has passed this has been the greatest day.  My nerves were absolutely tore up not knowing what I was going to hear upon going to the doctor today.  Now see for some reason I didnt even feel that way until the night before and I dont know why because what the doctor told me made me feel so comfortable.  Dr Smith is awesome.  Any of you who have seen her I hope feel the same way.  Not that I didnt care what she said about chloe because I will get to that.  She told me upon wanting to try again for another baby not to let any person or any medication get in the way of that.  If I and I alone were ready (of course with my husbands assistance hahahaha) she said for me to try again.  My thyroid medication she said could not get to the baby and they would not for any reason let me go past 38 weeks.  My 2 biggest concerns.  So with that being said...we are more than ready.  :)  Now what she told me about chloe was totally not what I expected but its not anything I havent already heard as someones opinion.  See when I delivered her my mom said the placenta was green and I questioned this after I seen my ob.  So I asked her why this was and she said it could have been where she had a bowl movement or it couldve been an infection.  With this being said this could have been why she is not with us but she thinks the same thing I think and have thought all along that my fluid trickled out and she quit floating.  Once again I dont have a definite answer as to why I lost my precious daughter but once again I remind you that I am ok with that.  Most people in my situation would be mad because of this but I have to look at this as to say God needed her more than I did.  I know I have said this and heard this more than I can count but I truely belive this and like I said most people would be angry but I am ok.  We have to move on with our new normal.  Not that I dont wish sometimes I could go back to September 19th and think maybe sometimes what if I could have done something differently.  I know yall are gonna tell me not to think like that but I cant help to do so and Im not blaming myself.  I appreciate everyones continued support and like I said I am thankful for those who call me or text me still to this day everyday.  YALL ARE AWESOME!!